Puppet Clown Pierrot
by stelyaria
Summary: England and America have an unfair relationship. The younger blond, who takes the role of the dominate, loves to demand much from his 'beloved'. Unbeknownst to him, the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland is slowly crumbling to nothing. Once a great empire, now a mere Pierrot for the United States to control.
_It's been two hours since our supposed rendezvous ..._

England stands in front of a certain fast food store as he (im)patiently waits for America. He glances at the silver watch he has on his left wrist and gets surprised by the data it displays. It was roughly 2 hours since the time of their improperly planned meet up. Like what others would think, he wanted to leave earlier, but this became a usual thing in their relationship so he stayed. That's _funny._ Haven't the United States of America and the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland in a special relationship for so long?

 _I'm standing here alone, so I guess that's your reply..._

The blond nation crosses his arms on his chest and taps the tip of his left shoe on the pavement. A frustrated expression was sewn on his face while he turned to look left and right for the stupid, obnoxious American boy, who, mind you, was nowhere to be seen or found. But then, he was used to this occurrence, right? Hasn't the younger nation been disappointing in one way or another recently?

 _The people passing by, the flowing clouds above..._

僕のことを **嘲笑って** **た**

Britain sighs. Today was supposed to be an astoundingly beautiful day in London; no rain nor excessive heat. Clouds of all shapes and sizes were floating high in the skyline, filtering just the right amount of sunlight and heat that would touch the ground of the United Kingdom's capital. However, the citizens that were passing by seemed to be quite bitter with their day. Perhaps rain did fit their attitudes and personalities better. But in the personification's point of view, he felt as if the clumps of water vapor in the air and the humans were sneering at him.

* * *

 _It was easy_

I found you in the middle of a barren field thanks to a certain acquaintance of mine. To my disappointment, there was another party who wanted to grasp hold of you. It seemed to be quite difficult for me seeing that you immediately fell in love with his amazing dishes and gourmet. Easily enough, I was hiding my shame in one area when you chose me over the other.

That was when things went rather smoothly. I took care of you as of you were my own child instead of how I would treat a colony. You appreciated my works, even my terrible cooking skills. Due to that, I was highly delighted and inspired to keep on going with what I've been able to start. Our bond as brothers grew stronger and stronger with each day passing. You'd hate it terribly if I had to go away for a few months. I usually chuckled at your adorable behaviour.

 _And yet extremely difficult_

When you grew up, the conflicts started to present themselves clearly in the spotlight. One good example of this was the French-Indian war. It wasn't my choice that I had to demand high amounts of tax from you and your citizens. Sadly, in the end, you wouldn't change your mind about independence and declared war. My country was already starting to break down. Your declaration added to the burden.

For more or less 8 years, everything between us had become a tornado of misunderstandings and arguments. Both you and I wouldn't give up on what we want. A lot of lives were lost, a bunch of things were sacrificed. What did all of the bloodshed do for us? Only negative for me, I believe.

This dispute continued until one faithful day. Rain was pouring down hard and the wind was gushing slightly. We both stood at the front lines, face-to-face. Behind you was a small brigade of soldiers, but, behind me was unforgiving mud and dirt. There was heavy-hearted conversing taking place between us. I attempted to attack you, which caused the fall of your weapon.

My musket was positioned at your face, ready to shoot- to kill you at any time. Your troops preparing to aim at my figure without your command. Did you ever think I could do that to you? I care for you. There is no way that I could. And with that, I crumpled to the ground, tears freely falling and sobs loudly escaping. Before leaving, you said something that hurt me more. Why did you?

 _I'll move on once I accept reality..._

When you left, I was nothing but a complete wreck. In fact, what I had previously described myself as was an understatement for I was beyond depression. At least my country was able to put itself together. However, I was emotionally ruined. I'd go drinking to forget, pass out crying, and wake up with a horrendous hangover to deal with. This was why happened for the first few years. Even after that phase, we were never the same again.

信じ **られ** なくて  
信じ **たく** なくて

At first, I couldn't believe everything that was taking place. It was all too much for me to take in, and my being could only hold so much. But then, I grew to not want to believe the facts. It felt much better to not accept reality as it is but rather how I want it to be.

 _I must be a mere clown to you, aren't I?_

After those tragic events, we hardly agreed on anything. You'd oppose me and I'd oppose you. On your side, you'd keep laughing at me as if I was trying to entertain a little child with my controlled actions and involuntary impulses. Am I just a simple laughing stock to you? Was I brought here to be your marionette instead of your ally?

You pull my strings, you manipulate me, and you laugh.

 _Ah, I spin and spin, and am tired of spinning._

I'm in denial and confusion. Being a part of this world; being a part of your world stresses me. Are you going to fulfill your promises, or are you sugar-coating everything with your disruptive dishonesty? Your words, your gestures, everything, you drive my head to spin. I'm spinning in a sea of negativity, not able to resurface or swim out of this mess. To be honest, I'm starting to get exhausted.

 _Ah, my breath, my breath_  
 _has run out_

Every event adds up weight to my chest. It's quite a bit of a burden, to be honest. I can't breathe as easily. It takes my breath away. And I, a former empire of glory, knows what it feels like to have something positive taking away your needed dosages of oxygen. However, this time, negativity's eating everything up. As it is in the facts, life has two sides, the joyful side and the bitter side. Whichever side you're currently on, your breath would be taken away.

 _Yes, this is the sad end of me_

A pile of negative emotions only waiting for salvation. I don't seem to see that silver lining in the clouds. Is there any hope left for me to grasp on?

君に辿り **着けない** ままで

I may be able to intertwine my fingers with yours, but they are not controlled by you. What I see is an enigma. You have thrown away your original self and replaced it with a much colder and ignorant one. Must you really do this to me? Are you that sadistic to watch me struggle inside your strong arms?

* * *

 _The Earth, carrying me, spins..._

As nations, they were born into this beautiful, rotating world. Each one was set to mingle and build relationships with each other. Whether it be an alliance or great tension. Younger nations, who are in need of guidance from a much more experienced country, can be raised by the elders as needed. Due to the fact that England once ruled most of the world, he knows the proper way of dealing with smaller ones. However, he puts up a quite grumpy outlook with the others.

For example, the current relationship he has with his ex-brother, America. Things have been going unfair on his side. With him contributing more than usual and the dominate demanding larger amounts. That's not how it works, right?  
There has to be equality unless one chooses to be generous.

 _Pretending not to know, it goes around..._

No one in this entire world can feel the Earth's movement. The only way to know that everything is moving is through the observation of the sun, moon, and seasons. However, we are not here to discuss about our planet, but rather on how the two blonds are going with their relationship.

As country personifications, they do not become one with their owned land. Due to this, they also do not feel anything. Figuratively speaking, Britain compares America to that of Earth. He does not feel any of the love while the other is secretly doing things without his consent.

 _For just a second, I held my breath_

Not taking the words literally again, England compares trust with breath. Back then, he would put all of his trust on the idiotic American. At this moment, his trust falters and he starts to doubt everything. Insecurity starting take over bit by bit, causing him to fear what will succeed after everything.

何も言えず立ちすくむ僕

Once the fear has grown too much, the bearer will become weary and still. Unknowingly, Arthur will become indecisive and end up in a staring contest with the current predicament he is in. If his significant other is around his presence, a lifeless dummy would be the best description of him. Complete submission is what would take place.

* * *

 _It was a coincidence_

When I pulled some strings to meet up with you, you were in the same field. A small rabbit was in your arms as words exchanged in between us. Your words were the basic greetings one would say to a person they'd just met. But then, you asked me if you should call me 'big brother'. In all honesty, that took me aback. No one would want to address the selfish, power-hungry, and greedy world superpower something that involves a lot of respect and love.

 _And it was fate_

It was destined to happen. No colony would ever stay at the side of their colonizers forever. When the spirit of nationalism strikes up, they'll want to break free and gain independence. I've learned this through my experience. As you know, I controlled most of the world. Now, look at me, I'm only former glory sitting in the Prime meridian. Fate can be cruel, right?

 _I knew it would be better if I didn't try to find out_

At this moment, I'm undergoing compensation. Should I really take everything into consideration or should I just settle for mediocrity? I have to be very cautious with my choices. I would not enjoy ending up as a pile of dust. Ignorance is a bliss as some love to say. Not only that, it brings more curiosity and therefore leads to the improper resourcefulness.

 _I felt your warmth on my skin_

America, you had showed great physical affection towards me. Kisses on my forehead, cheeks, and lips and bone-crushing hugs. You even wanted to take it further. I refused politely. It all felt so warm and nice. However, I have one question to ask of you.

Did any of those reflect your love for me?

その **笑顔** でその **仕草** で  
僕が **壊れて** しまうから

Your smile, your gestures are all fake. Why must you be leading into dishonesty? Why can't you just tell me that you don't want to be with me any longer? Or do you enjoy toying with my feelings? Are you not aware that you are breaking me? I can only take so much. I may not be human, but I am equal with you. My fellow nation, my ex-brother, my current 'lover', what is it that you truly want?

 _Ah, I spin and spin, and am tired of spinning_

My head and my heart, they hurt. My vision spins, causing a build up of unwanted sensations in my stomach. There's butterflies, somersaults, and tidal waves. I grow slightly dizzy with everything, therefore I'll refuse too much action. Will I be able to make it through? The world together survives rotation, while I, forever in solitude, cannot withstand the simple disputes life throws at me.

 _Ah, my breath, my breath, my breath will stop_

My limit is near, I am approaching at a turtle's pace. Alfred, my breath is running out. Don't worry, none of this was your fault. It is simply my own. My weakness prevented me from doing what would benefit everyone most. If that's the case, couldn't this be called a sacrifice for you? I love you, I love you lots. Do you know that? What about you? Do you love me enough to tell the truth?

 _Ah, things begin to change_

What I perceive is purely dull. I am becoming different. Is this what you would wish? My country, my economy, everything is falling apart. I can no longer take care of myself. Besides, what is left of my purpose?

 _Ah, it's a scary thought_

This is not a mere thought. This is what reality has become. Would you be the hero and take over the United Kingdom for me? I'm frightened that my siblings would mess everything up like I did.

 _I quit. I'm no longer waiting for you_

There is no need for me to wait for your real self come back. I'll give up on that. What is the point? Right now, I'm just a crumbling nation on the brink of fading away. Your real self has disappeared already. Thrown into the void of nothingness.

 _Otherwise I'll truly break_

Not just yet. One last string is left. Either you'll add more to reinforce me or you'll cut that off to finally end my years in this world. Will you be willing to control me and keep on laughing at me or end my pain and leave me alone?

 _Ah, I spin and spin, and am tired of spinning_

This is final. Everything depends on your decision. How much longer will you take? That string is getting thinner and thinner by the second.

 _Ah, my breath, my breath will stop_

Is there any oxygen left for me?

 _Yes, I am the Pierrot that you desire_

I am nothing but a marionette tugged by strings. Everything I am rests on the work of your hands. Make me do anything, embarrass me, ridicule me. Toy with my economy. I'm all yours to control, I just beg of you to not get rid of me.

 _Just_ _ **manipulate**_ _me as you want_


End file.
